Wednesday, July 9, 2014

6 Warning Signs That You're a Fantasy Addict

Sit down. I think we need to talk.

You see, your friends and family are very worried about you, dearie. They think you might have a bit of a problem. An addiction to fantasy books. So they called me in. It's sort of my specialty. We're just going to go over a few little things. We'll take appropriate action from there.

1: You can rattle off your top ten fantasy books at the drop of the hat.

Oh, you can? That's… interesting…

2: Your idea of a good Halloween costume was always witch, wizard, dragon, or some other such thing, rather than Frankenstein's monster or pirate.

A dark sorcerer? Four years running? All right, then…

3: You fight tooth and nail to prove that Dragonriders of Pern is just fantasy with some sci-fi sprinkled over the top.

Really? That's on there? Well, that's ridiculous. Everyone knows that's true…

4: An unviable system of magical laws can completely ruin a book or movie for you.

Well, you can say no all you like. The whole point was to see how well you understood the concept of a magic system.

5: You can (and do) rank authors on the originality and presentation of their version of high elves.

I personally prefer Douglas Niles' Sylves… but we're not talking about me, are we?

6: You can name at least three publishing houses or imprints that deal in fantasy. Without Googling it.

Well, of course you can.

I have some news for you. You're a fantasy addict, dearie.

Oh, now, don't cry. It's nothing to get upset about. In fact, you should smile. See, I have a secret for you. You aren't alone. Not at all. There are millions more just like you out there. Millions more just like us. Yes, yes, I'm in the same boat as you. A longboat. A longboat piloted by giants.

If you, like me, are a true and honest fantasy addict, stick around. You can subscribe through Blogger, through RSS, and through eMail.

Dreaming of fairies,
Voss

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